HER EYES SEE THROUGH ME, TO THE MAN I AM

• Today's suggested practice: 10 minutes.... (see below)

• My playlist while writing today's meditation: Bill Evans, My Foolish Heart  

• My morning practice: 30 minutes: Short warm-up, followed by Sat kriya

• My vulnerability practice: I listen, feel into to what my oracle shows me and, slowing myself, gingerly walk into trusting what I know...

—Hans Peter Meyer

MY MEDITATION What can I trust when I am trained to be so untrustworthy? Trained to deny myself that I may protect myself, my family, my herd... Where does this trust begin?

Perhaps with those most fragile creatures who choose to be in my company? To see, through their tender eyes, myself, capable of so much more than I imagine.

Something has shifted. And it's not the furniture, though that too has been reorganized in my bedroom, that shift in itself subtly vibrating through my day, my week. Of course, words spoken have said things. And, delicate things done. Bringing me macarons in the garden. Sitting for hours, losing track of time, few words spoken. A feeling of calm. Does she remember what I once said about macarons, what they once meant to us, once upon a time?

I am the keeper of memories. Sorting. Categorizing. She lives and dies in each moment. Memory like a death to her. Yet she remembers too. Always telling me, "You are always surprised.... You are always like that..." I feel these little things adding up.

And then, of course, words. Grateful for me. Appreciative of little things... "You're a big reason I could keep going," she tells me as she emerges from her darkness.

Things have shifted. Not just the furniture. There is a blossoming in this garden. She sees through to me and reveals herself. And I am grateful.

TODAY'S INSPIRATIONS 🌀Polarity without love looks a lot like manipulation.

...if you want to unclench and expose and dig deep and taste truth through the alignment of your heart with the heart of Love…..

If you want to know trust and devotion through flesh into god into life into all into the core of who vou are...

If you want to shed romanticized ideals of how another will complete you, and instead offer our completeness to the completion of another...

Welcome. (Nina Lombardo)

🌀Gratitude allows you to open up your senses and subtle senses to comprehend the fullest portion of this big picture. Challenges are connected to reasons; reasons are connected to cause; the cause is related to effect; effects are connected to options; options are connected to decisions, and decisions connect you to the actions of life....(Guru Singh and Guruperkarma Kaur, Pause...Breathe)

🌀The Conscious Warrior practices the cultivation of wonder and awe. (John Wineland, Precept 7)

🌀You're not like that now. (My beloved, my Oracle)

TODAY'S SUGGESTED PRACTICE

Ten minutes to look into yourself ...

Please read through first, then ...

• Find a mirror and stand or sit in front of it. Alternately, use your phone in "camera, selfie-mode." Set a timer for ten minutes.

• Look into your left eye. This is the receptive or "feminine" eye and as you peer into your own eye see how deep you can see...

• Slow your breath, filling and softening your belly as you inhale, gently pressing your navel against your spine as you exhale, but without a lot of effort. Today just slow and deepen your breath in a relaxed way, keeping your attention on your own left eye in the mirror... noticing what you see, and more importantly, noticing what you feel, especially any awkwardness.

• After a few cycles of breath notice whether you are in physical alignment, whether your shoulders are tight, your head tilted, your posture slumped... and, gently, almost imperceptibly, bring all of yourself into alignment as best as you can.... keep looking into your left eye.... keep breathing, a little more slowly with each breath, a little more deeply...

• Now, aligned, focused on your own left eye and looking deeply into yourself, notice thoughts and feelings, again especially any feelings of awkwardness. It is not "normal" to look into our own eyes. We rely on others to do this for us, to respond or react to what our eyes, our words, our behaviours are saying. But here, you are giving yourself feedback. Can you trust who you see? Can you open your heart to these eyes, this posture, this breath? Do you want to laugh, because it’s awkward to reveal yourself this way? Do you want to cry? Allow it all. There is no right or wrong. There is no up or down. There is only you, becoming a little more "naked" to yourself with every moment of attention. Your energetic feminine will revel in this attention, while your energetic masculine won't like this, will want to step back, want to detach. Notice if either of these responses emerges. Notice which is dominant. Notice how you can modulate this sensation of opening and feeling, of stepping back and protecting.

• As the timer signals gently close your eyes and relax your breath and posture. Take three breath cycles, without effort, to transition. Bow to yourself, unseen. Turn away from the mirror and open your eyes to the world beyond yourself. Step into your day, allowing any insights to come to when and if you are ready to receive them.

More practices and meditations at apprenticeshiptolove.com

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