AS SHE TELLS ME

• Today's suggested practice: Ten minutes ... (see below)

• My playlist while writing today's meditation: Dino Saluzzi, Según me Cuenta la Vida (As Life Tells Me) 

• My morning practice: 60 minutes, warm-up, followed by Sat kriya and Linking to the Infinite (see Practices to Open to the Infinitude of the Divine Feminine I-III at sacredbodies.ca)

• My vulnerability practice: I look into her eyes; she asks, Are you sad? I stand before her and feel everything, and I am enough.

—Hans Peter Meyer

MY MEDITATION

There is an infinite distance between us. Whether she sits across the table from me. Whether she sits in another neighbouring village. Whether she sits in an apartment across the country, a million miles away. Always, infinite distance. And, immediate proximity: I feel her, always. What is it her heart speaks?

Is understanding over-rated? The play of armchair athletes? In this game, in the midst of living and learning about love, there is only the constant change and the constant testing of my capacities to hold myself, hold this space, to breathe my presence into this space, my beloved. To be so still that, breathing, I know her opening and follow the trail of beauty she reveals...

The moment arrives, every moment arrives and no matter how prepared I am, there is only one question: To open, to close?

I choose, in this moment, to open, to feel the infinite proximity of Her tenderness in my own body.

I cannot hold Her without the necessary depth, the necessary strength. Firm. Grounded. Not stiff, not brittle. I cannot hold my beloved without the necessary and powerful presence of my deepest expression of who I am as her lover, as the man I am.

And so I practice. I become deeper. I become stronger. I become more still, more silent, and even more still and silent. I become a powerful presence, the man I am.

My Oracle, her darkness and mystery are to be held with reverence, to be known in their unknowability, her silence to be heard. Her absence to be held. She is to fly away and be with me at every moment, her every vibration showing me my way to open to the beauty and love and nourishment of this moment.

I am going, she said. Are you sad?

No. But in this moment I am afraid. And unreasonably happy too. A tenderness moving through me that brings sweetness to every breath. I choose to open, to be more, and more, and to let understanding wait.

TODAY’S INSPIRATIONS

🌀Life can only be understood backwards but it must be lived forwards. (Søren Kierkegaard)

🌀Breath more deeply. Steady your movements. Soften your heart. Make your gaze softer. Bring more playfulness until you can feel your partner's heart bloom. (John Wineland)

🌀...a good marriage is one in which each partner appoints the other to be the guardian of his solitude, and thus they show each other the greatest possible trust.... ( Rainer Maria Rilke, Letters to a Young Poet)

🌀I am always impressed by you. (My beloved, my Oracle)

TODAY'S SUGGESTED PRACTICE

Ten minutes to breathe into yourself ...

Please read through first, then ...

• Find a mirror and stand or sit in front of it. Set a timer for ten minutes.

• Look into your left eye. This is the receptive or "feminine" eye and as you peer into your own eye see how deep you can see...

• Breathing without effort as you penetrate your own left eye with your awareness also become aware of yourself breathing in the mirror. Just notice.

• After a few cycles of breath notice whether you are in alignment, whether your shoulders are tight, your head tilted, your posture slumped... and, gently, almost imperceptibly, bring all of yourself into alignment as best as you can.... keep looking into your left eye.... keep breathing, a little more slowly with each breath, a little more deeply...

• Now, aligned, focused on your own left eye and looking deeply into yourself, also notice your breath and begin to gently slow and deepen your breath even more. Try to breathe yourself in the mirror. Imagine you are breathing your mirror image, holding your mirror image with your slow, deep, stable breath....

• Continue to look into your left eye, with micro-adjustments attending to your posture, your breath, and noticing whether these adjustments are reflected in your feelings, your opening or closing, your many thoughts... notice, and allow of this to keep moving... nothing matters, and yet every little thing has infinite impact.... the paradox of your polarity.... can you polarize with yourself?

• As the timer signals gently close your eyes and relax your breath. Bow to yourself, unseen, in the mirror. Open your eyes to the world beyond the mirror and take whatever moment of wisdom —not understanding, but the insight of experience— into your day. You are deep. You are powerful. You have all that it takes to awaken and align with your deepest presence. You can choose to open to this, and to bring this as your gift to the world.